I use to curse like a sailor.

I am ashamed to admit it, but when I was younger I use to curse worse than a sailor. One of the guys in my neighborhood taught me how,  and I took that newly acquired skill to professional levels. I always had the right word at the right time. The way that I strung them together was masterful. I was seriously a pioneer in profanity.

When I was a junior in high school, I had a change of mind. I repented and realized that I needed to stop cursing. This was a real moment. I understood the need to stop. I changed my mind, my will, I had a desire to stop!

It took 2 years for me to completely stop cursing. 2 YEARS. I repented, but I did it wrong.

A lot of times, when we're faced with issues in our life, WE get convicted by the Spirit of God. WE  realize that we need to change. WE try to make this change happen by our own will. WE fail, so we either continue in our sin, or we stop trying.

Today, I believe that if I would have taken that conviction and prayed to God to help me stop. If I were truly sorry and realized that I was powerless over this and asked God to help, it would have taken far less time, and God would have gotten the glory.

As Christians, we don't change because we want to. We change because God called us to be Holy. He sent Jesus to be a sacrifice for us because we were incapable of making the changes necessary to live a holy life ourselves. Jesus told us that He needed to leave so he could send His Holy spirit what would teach us all things and bring all things to our remembrance. (John 14:26)

One of my favorite passages in the Bible is 1 Peter 5:6-7

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6-7 ESV)

When God calls us to repentance, He doesn't expect us to figure out how to change ourselves. He wants to help us and mold us into the image of His son.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified. (Romans 8:26-30 ESV)

God searches out hearts, He knows us. He wants to conform us to the image of his Son. He justifies and glorifies.

So... let us struggle to not try and fix ourselves on our own. Let us truly repent and take full benefit of what God offers us to we can truly be Christians... followers of Christ.